Wow. I've had quite the month.I wrote a couple of posts but they simply were not for sharing, so I stayed away. I am still not ready to share what was going on, but it all resulted in a bout of depression that I just couldn't seem to drag myself from. I think I had been heading that way, winter is usually a struggle for me, but our family had some problems shortly after Christmas that just seemed huge and insurmountable and it was all I could do to get myself showered and to work each morning. I'm sad to say that almost every day that I didn't run (Up until this week, my grand total for January was 6.7 miles.) I would think about how it would make me feel better, even just for a bit, but it was as though I didn't want to feel better. I wanted to soak in the depression, hide under my covers, sleep the days away. I literally would get up in the morning and think, "Okay. I have 12 hours until I can reasonably climb back in bed." And throughout the day, I would count down the hours. And then I would get home from work around 4:00 and climb in bed for a nap and get up at 6, throw something together for dinner and go right back to bed. My children played a lot of video games and watched a lot of tv this month. I'm not proud of it. My husband tried to be supportive, but he really didn't understand how it was so bad for me. I didn't understand. I still don't. Looking back, it really wasn't that bad, and now that I'm dealing with what is happening, it turns out everything was for the best.
So enough of that! Despite my hibernation, lots has been happening around here that I am excited about (now that I have given myself permission to be excited about things). I was trying to motivate myself to get running again, and registration for the Boilermaker was happening mid-month. I knew it would sell out quickly again, and I registered the morning it opened.
Good thing! It closed out in less than 3 days. Part of that is that they allow bib transfers now, so I think a lot of people who thought "Well, maybe. But if not I can sell it to someone" and just signed right up. Last year it sold out in March. Next year I think I will set my alarm for midnight and get up in the middle of the night to register! I can't imagine NOT running the Boilermaker! If it was not for this race 4 years ago, I never would have progressed beyond a 5K. I know it. I had no interest in running further than 3 miles. Anyway, the news: The husband said, "Hey! Maybe I'll run it too." Whaaaa? The husband hasn't run in almost 10 years. That's another story completely...but please note that we have been married for almost 10 years, and he has been out of the Army for almost 10 years. He put up a good argument for why he would be able to do it, so I registered him. With my own money. And I paid for a ridiculously expensive training shirt (it's pretty cool actually...kind of wish I got one for me...but I got myself one last year for the 35th anniversary, since I would be 35. Milestones and all.)
and he also registered for the 4 mile shamrock run I did last year with his best friend (he and the bf's girlfriend went bar hopping while the two of us ran the race. Incidentally, that's the first race of mine he ever came to. Mostly because the best friend ran. And there was beer. Green beer.) I insisted in buying him real running shoes and dragged him to my favorite sneaker store so he could be properly fitted for shoes. (He thought he could throw on the pair that have been gathering spiders in the bottom of the shoe closet since his last run a decade ago.)
I'm so proud of him, he's been hitting the treadmill with an actual training plan (one of his own making...but it's a plan!) He's also been encouraging me to get on there and get moving as well, which coupled with things straightening themselves out around here has been instrumental in lifting the cloud I started the new year with.
So the last 3 days of the month I logged just under 8 miles. Considering this doubled my total for the month, and all runs were done in my disgusting dreary basement, it's progress.